Armed only with the knowledge that their sons will be mocked and bullied mercilessly by their classmates should they fail in their task, thousands of concerned mothers have taken to the internet to try and work out what in God’s name the Black Ops is and why they need to buy two.
“Ladies, calm down. Surely this is just Modern Warfare 4?”, queried BigMomma33, a forum member at cafemom.com. “Because I’m pretty sure the last one I bought was Modern Warfare 3, so this must be Modern Warfare 4, right?”
“Wait, wasn’t Modern Warfare actually Call of Duty 4? So we must surely be up to at least number five by now?”, responded an uncertain YummyMummy1977.
“No, no, no! Don’t confuse things!”, replied Mydogsleepsonthebed. “We’ve discussed this before and we all agreed that Call of Duty 5 became Battlefield 3, so I think there’s a good chance we’re actually dealing with Battlefield 4.”
“For the love of God can anyone tell me what Hello 4 is?”, asked another frantic user.
Meanwhile, young gamers are increasingly concerned that even if by some miracle their moms successfully purchase the right game, it will almost certainly be for the wrong system.
“I wrote everything down for my mom, but the stupid bitch still went and got me Dishonored for the PS3 instead of the 360”, said a teary-eyed Graham Jones of Montgomery, Alabama. “I mean, seriously, what the fuck? She was the one that said I couldn’t have a PS3 because it was too expensive, and now she’s mocking me by buying games for it?”