Excitement as man finds small area of land in UK with 4G signal

The fourth G

Mr Phillips points to where he found the 4th G

A man from Southend-on-Sea has found what is thought to be the UK’s first known location with a reliable 4G signal.

The small patch of land, approximately two-metres across, was discovered by 52-year-old Thomas Phillips in a quiet residential cul-de-sac close to his home in North Shoebury. The site has since become a hotspot for thousands of frustrated EE customers as they scramble to experience the elusive fourth G for themselves.

Speaking to The Daily Pixel, Mr Phillips told of his surprise when he realised that his £55-a-month handset had at long last connected to the UK’s highly anticipated 4G network:

“When I saw the little 4G indicator in my status bar I literally just froze, I couldn’t believe my eyes. The salesman in Phones4U had said that I might feel some sort of magical, tingly sensation when I first connected to a 4G network, but apart from the initial shock I guess I felt pretty normal.

“My hands were shaking but I managed to call my girlfriend and told her I was speaking to her on 4G. I asked if she could tell the difference and she said I sounded a bit posher, which was nice.

“Next I booted up Angry Birds to see what it was like with 4G turned on. I’d been stuck on this one level for months but to my surprise this time I managed to clear it with two birds to spare. I couldn’t fucking believe it!”

Despite Mr Phillips’ initial positive experience, he warned those interested in experiencing the awesome power of the 4G that Facebook nevertheless remained full of insecure, narcissistic wankers.


One Comment

  1. This seems to good to be true, I smell a marketing campaign from EE.
    Has Mr Philipps stated that he does not have ties with EE? I didn’t think so! OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE!

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